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Women Give Men Oral Cancer


As per this article:

http://articles.nydailynews.com/2011-02-22/entertainment/28639602_1_oral-cancer-hpv-vaccines-cervical-cancer

Black dudes were always right. Don’t go down on a bitch.

“Researchers found a 225% increase in oral cancer cases in the U.S. from 1974 to 2007, mainly among white men… The more oral-sex partners a man had, the greater his cancer risk”

What if it’s a dark dude with white chicks? Guess it doesn’t really matter because the darker you are the less likely you are to engage in much oraling. I mean, sex is just good. Why put your woman at risk for a UTI or yeast-escapade when your penis is probably one of the more cleaner parts of the body, sans balls.

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Women Ain’t Entitled


I’m not happy how entitled women are feeling these days. F that. I get to the elevator, and by default I’ll let the ugliest most fattest broad in the world get on before I do. But these hoebags get there and don’t even wait for me to offer my spot on the invisible line for the elevator. They cut me off and walk right up to the doors when they hear that “ding!” What kinda bullspit is that? They do the same crap when they walk on the streets or wait to go up the escalators. Skip me as if I’m some Third World worker. Bitch, I make more than you by default because of my tiny pecker- back of the line like the ugly slut you are.

Still Alive


I got a second lease on life. I was excited because I’ll be going to a football game for my birthday this year, and I told Mrs. Brownman “yay! Birthday game! Yay turning 32!”

She said “you’re turning 31.”

I thought that one over for a bit. “Oh snap, yay! I just bought myself a full year! I’m gonna live it up now! Hooray 31!”

Guess old age isn’t agreeing with me yet.

Pass this over


Sorry for the hiatus from blogging. I can’t decide if this is fun anymore. But I digress.

No, I’m not Jewish so I wasn’t celebrating. But funny you brought that up. We got this chick at work that is all-of-a-sudden Jew because she heard that there’s a free trip to Israel if you are in fact Jewish. I’ve referenced her as “English” in the past. English has become hardcore Jew since her trip from what I’m told, even though her mother isn’t the one who’s Jewish.

In her out-of-office e-mail this past Tuesday, she put “I’m out of the office for Passover…” Really? You gotta let the world know why you’re out…especially ‘cause of Passover? What if that offends me?

Which it should offend me. I mean, when she left for her Passoverings Monday night she let us all know she’ll be out for Passover but still working late at night. As she said good night a coworker replied “happy holiday”. I wanted to say “yea, thanks for killing my savior you hoe”.

Hmm, maybe I do like blogging. Very therapeutic.

Shave that chin boy


Brownman: so bust it. this jew dude. new to the company

Brownman: maybe…a month now?

Brownman: we’re all jokey and such…don’t really bust balls or anything. but last night on the way out, i sent a file for review, and he wanted to talk about it, but i sorta snapped and said we’ll chat tomorrow

BrownmanL: today he said “yea u really shot back yesterday” and i said “sorry man, just had to be out and i didn’t have the time to spare.”

Brownman: then he says after a bit “so when are u gonna shave that soul patch u got going there?”

Brownman:  i was like “whuuuut?”

Brownman: “yea…that p-diddy soul patch”

Mrs. Brownman: what????

Brownman: i said “it’s not really a soul patch…but yea, it’s fine.”

Mrs. Brownman: so he’s trying to joke around with u?

Brownman: i think so. and it’s cool to joke around… but when i snapped or talked to him generally…never do i bring in appearance or anything personal. and i dunno…i feel sorta offended. me. of all people. its so random what troubles me

Mrs. Brownman: lol aww…well it is rude what he said. cause it’s not like you’ve open the joke door to him…there’s a certain point in time when it’s cool to start joking with someone. but that’s after u’ve kind of tested the water

Brownman: right. i’m thinking to myself “i never asked u to shave that yamaka  off ur head” to jew boy

Mrs. Brownman: lol

Brownman: cuz traditionally…the chin fuzz is muslim. which is why my grandmother hates it so much

Mrs. Brownman: yeah it’s not like u’ve been lazy growing out ur beard or something

Brownman: so i mean…what if it were a religious thing?

Mrs. Brownman: true

Pop Farts


First thing in the morning, I prefer to not smell crap. I mean, yea I’ll smell it on the way to work ‘cause I’m in the city. But not at 9AM in our work restrooms. I know that most men have a schedule and it’s really my fault for deciding to wash my hands when I got in to work BEFORE eating breakfast…but I can still complain. 2 of 2 stalls were taken, so that gave me a concentrated poop-smell that will forever haunt all my senses…even sight. I saw the smell…and now everyday at 9AM I will see the AM vapors surround my Pop Tart.

Fashion is weird…these pants…what the…


I am by no means a fashion expert. So if anything out of the ordinary pop up in New York City I’m gonna probably incorrectly deem it weird and punishment on the eyes. Take, for example, this new fad. Skinny grown woman wearing baggy ass pants. Slacks. And these slacks are worn all the way up…I guess in some cases right under their boob. It looks like a 5 year-old who pulled his PJ pants too high while trying to get ready for bed. Or half a onesie…a halfsie.

I personally think this is just a fad for women who got ridiculed for trying to rock skinny pants and jeans with no ass. The assless have rejoiced in semi-fitted MC Hammer pants. Here’s an example: