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Fifi Blogs: “Really?!?”


Fifi: i can’t order my panini anymore

Brownman: y?

Fifi: dude was so rude and weird

Brownman: what happened??

Fifi: i ordered it online as usual
but the order fucked up and gave only 75 cents tip
so i was gonna give him cash when he got here
so i told the receptionist to let me know when he did
so she told me…
i ran up front to give him money
dude didn’t even see i had money in my hand he turned away and said “whatever”
and just left
it was so weird
like usually they just drop and go cause it’s already been paid for
so i wonder if he thought i was gonna yell at him or something
even as he was leaving i was like “um here” holding at the money
he wouldn’t even turn around. it was so weird

Brownman: whoa. that is super weird, and dick

Fifi: yeah

Brownman: hmm, this is a “REALLY?!?” blog


Fifi : i need to go home

Brownman : what?? why?

Fifi : i’m in such a pissy mood

Brownman : ooh what happened? train?

Fifi : i am SOOOOOO glad we’re raising our kids in long island

Brownman : uh oh why

Fifi : just these ghetto ass girls are sooooo obnoxious
like disgusting
first group got on the train with their headphones blaring
each playing a different song
so it’s loud and annoying
then they talk to each other over their headphones even louder

Brownman : ugh

Fifi : then one of them goes “this is our song! every time we fuck we listen to this song, but we’re so cheap we play it through the headphones”
so then they get off at 46th or something
then queens plaza two more girls get on and they’re even louder than the last ones
but these girls sound a little older
not much but a little
and they’re laughing REALLY loud
and every other word out of their mouth is either shit or fuck
and they start making jokes about different races really loud
so one guy tells them to be quiet and they start making fun of him

Brownman : wow

Fifi : OMG i hate ghetto kids

Brownman : classic ghetto!

Fifi : esp the girls
they have no sense anymore what it means to be a girl
they all act like they got a dick in between their legs
it’s so disgusting
so help our daughter if she EVER acts like that
i will smack the ghetto out of her

Brownman : don’t worry, i’m copying and pasting this for the blog
so she can read up on the manual

Fifi : UGH

Brownman : “how to be our daughter”

Fifi : good
u better make a PDF version to so she can print
and pass it along to her friends to follow
cause her friends can’t be ghetto either
i forbid it
and ESP not her boyfriend
and so help our son if he dates a ghetto girl

Brownman : maybe a diagram too, they can study what parts of their body they can’t talk about nor let their boys touch

Fifi : i don’t even care what race

Brownman : yea we’ll have a No Ghetto Policy

Fifi : i am so happy you and your sister didn’t end up ghetto

Brownman : zero tolerance


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