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I’m Only Shooting You As A Friend

Brownman: 5 years now has passed and you haven’t been able to beat off because your hands have grown a sensitive tumor. Only girl around is a black chick.
Brownman: will you take the bj?

Bellies: LMAO i would be able to self-stimulate

Brownman: 2 years have now passed since you last self-stimulated because the doctors say the next time you rub/gyrate against the walls/bed you will get a stroke
Brownman: will you take the damn bj? you balls are now noticeably blue

Bellies: LMAO LOL NO
Bellies: i will find a way
Bellies: no rubbing, no gyrate
Bellies: I will find a way

Brownman: i am now pointing a gun at you because i am tired of seeing my friend try to find a way to relieve himself and we are 35 years old at this point.

Brownman: i will shoot you
Brownman: will you now take the bj?

Bellies: hmm 35 hmm
Bellies: fine i am still too young to die

Brownman: excellent. Finally. Here

Brownman: that’s ur girl

Bellies: LMFAO
Bellies: brb

Brownman: That’s right, go whack off to her


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