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Toilet Talk: A Pooper’s Worst Nightmare

There it is. The moment of poopth: you sit on the toilet and immediately browse Facebook on your iPhone far too long before seeing the picture below. No toilet paper. After you have expressed your interest relieving your bowels of duty patrol. Where bowel meets bowl.

No toilet paper.

I panicked. I mean- there were some toilet seat covers that could hold me down until I could get up and move to the next stall when the coast was clear. And when I did move onto the next stall, I discovered bountiful rolls of toilet paper on their rolls: locked up. I realized too late that I should have just finished up in that stall.

But dammit the pressure was on. I freaked out for going too long with a partially wiped ass, so I grabbed hand napkins by the sink and was forced to wipe with the heavily textured paper on my delicate hole.


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