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This Week in Subway Review

-I got hit by yet another woman’s big ass bag while I was sitting down on the train and she was standing up reading a magazine. I ignored the bag hitting once she hit me unknowingly with her magazine. How do you not notice that you dropped half of your magazine on a human’s head while trying to turn the pages?

-People are still eating on the train. This particular incident has a dude eating on a CROWDED train. Don’t these weirdos not worry about the lack of cleanliness of the subways- many minorities ride these damn trains. And dude- I’m hungry whether it be the ride in or ride home: stop it.

-We saw a woman (Asian, of course) holding onto the rail with one glove on. It was very Michael Jackson-tributesque. The Asians are very hygienic I must admit. What up with the teeth thing?

-A dude declared to his friend “yo my feet really stink” rather loud over my headphones. WTF bro? Now that I’m standing above said feet I can’t help but worry as the trains are delayed yet again.

-I’m stuck on the train where the doors won’t close. And after watching the conductor walk back and forth between cars I wasnt surprised when the train went out of service. And I wasn’t surprised that a Caribbean lady announced this over the PA system. Why do only West Indians work the MTA?


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