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Kissing Rituals In Cultures


We were driving home when the topic came up.

“Brown Man, you’re going to have to explain your father!” Fifi (my Irish fiancee) exclaimed.

“Mmm well he’s dark and weird for starters…hard to understand…”

“No…I understand him better than some of your other family members actually because he talks slow. But I need to know how to tell him ‘bye’…”

“Mmm just say ‘lata nigga’ and he’s fine.”

“No, I was saying ‘bye’ to everyone at Virginia Beach and I went through the motions. I kissed your mother, aunt, male and female cousins goodbye just like when you say ‘hello’ to them. But your father, I went to kiss him on the cheek like how I’ve seen other girlfriends of your cousins do to bid farewell. When I went to do it he extended his hand for a shake, so I extended mine but by that moment he had a fist out. So I shook his fist.”

“That is awesome! I don’t even know how to handle my father. You’re fine. You don’t want to get into a Seinfeld situation anyways…you kiss him farewell just one time, then you’re obligated to do so all the time. Fist pound him next time.”

Methinks minorities and foreigners do the whole kissing hello and goodbye than whites. Fifi had to warn her mother that my mother is a kisser-helloer when they met. I think my father is actually anti-everything, the man doesn’t like interaction in the first place. He barely can return a hug whenever I thank him for something.

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One Response

  1. LMFAO

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